Choosing Different in a World That Rewards the Same

Breaking the cycle of social norms to reclaim my health, my willpower, and my relationship with God.

I used to be the person who would look at your half-full water glass at a party and ask a question I now cringe at. I’d say, “Wait, you won’t even take one shot?”

I wasn’t just a social drinker. I was an unofficial ambassador for the status quo. To me, alcohol was the heartbeat of belonging. It was the signal that the work day was over and the proof that we were actually having fun. If you didn’t drink, I’ll be honest, I thought you were boring. I thought you were the mood killer who was intentionally limiting your own joy.

I felt the same way about food. I looked at plant-based eating as a life of restriction. I thought it was unhealthy or just a very tedious way to live. My internal dialogue was a constant loop: Why wouldn’t you just do what everyone else is doing? Why make it difficult?

I lived by the script society wrote for us. I didn’t realize that by following that script, I was slowly losing the lead role in my own life.

The Heavy Fog

The shift didn’t happen overnight, but the cracks started showing after 2020. I looked in the mirror and didn’t recognize the person looking back. I was heavier, but it was more than that. I was trying to reach big goals while holding onto habits that were actively tripping me up.

I started hating the heavy-headed mornings. I noticed that instead of working toward my dreams, I was just looking for the next thing to celebrate.

Physically, my body was screaming for a break. I was living on Tums and aloe vera juice to soothe a stomach that was constantly bloated. I told myself that feeling this way was normal and that everyone must feel a little sick and tired all the time.

Then, I tried a 36-hour watermelon fast. For the first time in years, my stomach felt quiet. It felt like my body was finally exhaling and saying thank you for giving me a break. That small moment of relief was the evidence I couldn’t ignore. I realized that “normal” was actually just a state of collective exhaustion.

The “Alien” at the Table

Choosing to change is one thing. Choosing to change in a world that wants you to stay the same is another. My husband and I decided to take this leap together. We quit alcohol and went plant-based at the same time. We knew our circle revolved around the bar and we knew we were about to become the “odd balls.”

The teasing came fast. People asked how long it would last or if I was pregnant when I turned down a drink. It’s a strange feeling to be a grown woman and feel like an alien at a dinner table just because your glass is filled with sparkling water instead of vodka.

But as the weeks turned into months, the external noise mattered less because the internal results were so loud.

The Transformation

The “itis” after meals vanished. The brain fog lifted. I didn’t just lose 40 pounds, I lost the “look” of a drinker. I’ll never forget a vendor I hadn’t seen in a year interrupting my presentation just to ask, “Are you Katrina?” They couldn’t believe the transformation.

The physical change was just the surface. Underneath, I gained something I didn’t know I was missing. I gained willpower. By removing the distraction of alcohol, I found a deeper relationship with God. I stopped saying things just because I was intoxicated and started having conversations I actually remembered. I stopped drifting and started deciding.

Believing in the Goal

I’ve realized that society paints a very specific picture. It says if alcohol isn’t involved, it’s not an event. It says it’s just a “team-building exercise.” We are programmed from birth to care more about what the group thinks than what our own intuition is telling us. That’s where the resentment and depression hide. It hides in the gap between who we are and who society expects us to be.

The hardest part of this journey wasn’t actually quitting the meat or the alcohol. It was the mental hurdle of believing that I could actually achieve a goal I set for myself. It was realizing that I didn’t need to wait for permission to be healthy.

If you feel that pull to change but you’re scared of standing out, I want to ask you: How are you feeling, really? And what is actually stopping you? It only takes the first step. When you feel like you don’t have the strength to push through the social pressure, remember that prayer is everything. Standing out is a small price to pay for finally being able to see yourself clearly.

Thanks for spending a few minutes with me.

-Kat